Chapter Twenty – True Confessions
We all slept late the next morning. I woke up before Keith did. I rolled over and looked over to see if he was awake. I had a morning woody that tented the sheets since I had slept naked after Ruth Ann had left me last night. Thinking about Ruth Ann brought back to my mind all of the chaos of emotions that had kept me awake for a long time after she returned to her room. Why couldn’t I be like Keith and be so certain about what I wanted? He seems so sure of where he is going, what he is doing and when he is going to do it. I looked across at Keith and saw that he had a major woody, too. He must have slept naked as well because it was pretty evident under the sheet. As I watched, Keith stirred and opened his eyes.
Keith saw me looking at him and said, “Looks like we both have morning woodies!”
I blushed a little at being caught looking him over. “Yes, I get them most mornings,” I said.
Keith laughed, “Yeah, me too!” He rolled over to look at the clock, “Wow! We really did sleep late! It’s nearly 11 o’clock!”
“I guess we’d better get up and get dressed,” I said.
Keith agreed, “Let’s put that huge shower to use.” Keith got up and crossed the room to the bathroom his manhood pointing the way. He turned and laughed, “Come on, Glenn! You don’t have anything I haven’t seen already. We look so much alike I’m sure your equipment is the same size as mine.”
With that statement, I threw off the bed sheet and got up and followed my cousin into the bathroom. Keith had already adjusted the temperature and had the two showerheads going along with the ones in the wall that hit us about waist high. We showered and dried ourselves off. Clean and feeling refreshed, we quickly dressed for the day and went looking to see who was awake.
Joe and Katie were sitting out on the deck when we came downstairs. Joe saw us and waved us to join them. Joe said, “You all must have stayed up late talking. You two are the first ones we’ve seen this morning. The girls have yet to make an appearance”
Keith responded, “Kerry and I decided to take a walk on the beach last night before going to bed. We couldn’t resist sitting on the beach in the moonlight.”
“How romantic, Keith!” Katie responded. “Just don’t forget to keep the romance alive and well after you’re married!”
“I hope you let someone know you were going out on the beach,” Joe said rather pointedly.
“We told Ruth Ann we were going so she knew where we were and wouldn’t get worried if she woke up and Kerry wasn’t there.”
“I knew they were out the beach as well,” I said, noting the surprised look on Keith’s face as I spoke.
“How did you know?” Keith asked.
“You woke me up when you closed the door. I got up and watched out the window as you and Kerry headed down to the beach,” I said, grinning from ear to ear. “You should know by now that you can’t keep secrets from me, cousin.”
Keith’s sheepish grin confirmed the fact he thought he had done a good job of keeping his little outing on the beach a secret from me. Luckily for Keith, the girls joined us on the deck. Keith quickly took advantage of their arrival and turned the conversation towards the subject of food.
“Is anyone hungry for breakfast?” Keith asked.
We all answered him at the same time, “Yes!”
“Help yourselves. Breakfast is on the buffet. We just finished breakfast ourselves,” Katie said, smiling at the four of us.
We all went into the dining room and helped ourselves to generous portions of scrambled eggs, sausages, fried potatoes, and pancakes. Even the girls seemed extra hungry this morning. Ruth Ann sat next to me and managed to hold my hand through most of breakfast. She seemed to have a glow about her this morning.
“Kerry and Ruth Ann, would you and your family like to spend the next week with us? Our grandpa asked us to extend an invitation to you to come visit with them,” Keith said.
Both girls nodded their heads in the affirmative.
“I’ll be right back. I’m going out on the deck to ask your parents about it,” Keith said.
He came back a few minutes later with a big grin on his face. “Joe and Katie said they would love to come meet our family. I’ll call Grandpa and let him know that we will be coming later today. I can’t wait to share our news with them,” Keith said excitedly as he gave Kerry a hug. “Grandpa already told me he approved of you and wanted to get to know you better.”
It didn’t take long for us to get our things together and help Joe and Katie close up the beach house. Ruth Ann and Kerry joined Keith and I in the Mustang for the drive back to my grandparents’ home. Ruth Ann and I sat in the back seat. It was a little snug but we didn’t mind, especially after last night. While Keith and Kerry talked over wedding plans, Ruth Ann and I discussed many topics such as religion, family and finances. It almost felt like Ruth Ann had made up a list of questions to ask her potential “Mr. Right.”
After a couple of hours of answering Ruth Ann’s questions, I said, “Wow! You sure ask a lot of tough questions. It feels like you have a check list and are marking down my answers!”
Ruth Ann grinned, “As a matter of fact, I do. Last year, I made up a list of 100 questions to ask the guy I wanted to marry. I wrote the list in my journal. I re-read that list this morning before we left so they would be fresh in my mind.” As she said this, she squeezed my hand.
“So did I pass,” I asked, laughing at Ruth Ann’s impish grin.
“Yes, you passed with flying colors,” she said. Ruth Ann pulled my head down so she could give me a warm and gentle kiss.
Keith must have seen her in the mirror because he said, “Hey! That’s my cousin you’re kissing back there!”
Ruth Ann just laughed and kissed me even more passionately than before. Kerry turned around in her seat with an amazed look at her little sister.
Ruth Ann asked her sister, “What? Can’t I kiss a guy?”
Kerry responded with a smile and wink at me, “Sure, I’m glad you are hitting it off with Glenn. Just remember, Glenn, Ruth Ann’s my sister so be careful! You will be caught before you know what happened to you!”
Ruth Ann’s laugh brought a smile to my face. She and I knew I was already under her spell. She entwined her fingers with mine and didn’t let go until we arrived at my grandparents’ house.
We were unloading our stuff from the car when both Grandma and Grandpa came out to welcome us home. Grandma took Kerry in her arms and said, “Welcome, Kerry dear, we are so glad to have you come to visit with us. And who is this?”
“This is my little sister, Ruth Ann. She just graduated from high school same as Glenn,” Kerry answered.
Grandma pulled Ruth Ann into a warm embrace, “Welcome, Ruth Ann. I’m glad you came. You are a very beautiful young lady. I’m sure my grandson has already noticed that.” Grandma looked directly at me as she said this last.
“Yes, Grandma, I did notice,” I said, with a grin which caused Ruth Ann to blush prettily.
“Good. Let’s get your things and show you to your rooms,” Grandma said, as she led the way back into the house.
After the girls were settled, they came back downstairs to join us in the family room where Keith and I were watching TV. They joined us on the couch. Joe and Katie arrived a few minutes later. Grandma and Grandpa welcomed them and took them up to their room.
The adults soon joined us. Keith stood up and said, “Grandma and Grandpa, I want to give some good news. Kerry and I are engaged to be married!”
Grandma came over and gave both Keith and Kerry a hug. “I am so very happy for you both. So when’s the wedding?”
Kerry answered, “We want to be married before school starts again in the fall. So we think sometime in August.”
Katie said, “That gives us just enough to get everything ready. Don’t you agree, Joe?”
“Sure dear. I’m sure Kerry has a very well thought plan,” Joe said, laughing at the look on Katie’s and Kerry’s faces.
“Well, you do have a plan don’t you?” Joe asked half jokingly.
“Yes, Dad, I do but it’s still in draft. We need to sit down with both sets of parents to finish planning everything out.”
Grandpa said, “Keith’s parents will be here within the hour. They will be spending the week with us, as well. It sounds like things will be pretty busy around here this week.” Grandpa seemed very happy with how things were working out.
The rest of the week went very fast for me. With all of the wedding plans being made, Ruth Ann and I had a lot of free time together. Each night after everyone was in bed; Ruth Ann would join me in my room and return to her own room just before dawn. I was amazed she could even function at that hour of the morning! I am even more amazed she wants me to be her boyfriend! In fact, I haven’t thought of anything else since we got here!
After Kerry and Ruth Ann left for home with their parents, Keith came into my room and sat down on my bed. “So, how do you like Ruth Ann?”
“I like her a lot, Keith. I am still pretty confused about some things but I do know that I could really fall for Ruth Ann,” I said.
“I hope you do, cousin. It would be really cool to have you as my brother-in-law! Just think of the fun we could have together!” Keith exclaimed with great enthusiasm. “Isn’t being with Ruth Ann so much better than being with Ian?”
My face must have betrayed my thoughts of confusion because Keith said, “Why is there any question about it, dude? Ian treated you badly didn’t he?”
“Not when we were together, Keith. He was good to me. We just didn’t talk about our future together. You just don’t understand,” I said, trying not to get angry with my cousin.
“You’re right, Glenn. I don’t understand how you could think being with Ian is even close to being as good as being with Ruth Ann,” Keith said, his exasperation showing in his voice. “Ruth Ann is drop dead gorgeous, has a great personality and a wicked sense of humor. What’s there not to like?”
“I didn’t say I didn’t like Ruth Ann. I’m just saying that being with Ian was good, too. At least until he dropped me without as much as a thank you for all the good times!” I said. “I’m still angry about that. So what’s to say that Ruth Ann won’t do the same thing to me? She knows I’m gay. We talked about Ian and what he did to me.”
“Ian is in the past. You need to put him behind you and move on. You can make this work, Glenn,” Keith said in a pleading tone. “Glenn, I want you to be happy. I don’t see you being happy with a guy. Guys are very selfish and abusive. You have already seen that with Ian.”
“Keith, that’s not true of all guys. You’re not like that,” I pointed out.
“You’re right in that I’m not abusive and hope I never will be, but I am self-centered and can be very manipulative when I need to be. I know that about myself and try to keep things under control most of the time,” Keith said. “Will you at least give it some serious thought?”
“Okay. Just be warned that I’m still a very mixed up guy. I don’t think I can change that by turning a switch on or off. You know I really like your roommate, Rick.”
“Yes, I am aware of that, as well. You will find you won’t get far with Rick. He is definitely not into guys at all. He’s all marine and about as masculine as they come.”
“But that is what attracts me to him. He is so handsome and exudes maleness. I like that in a guy,” I said dreamily.
“Stop it, Glenn!” Keith shouted at me. “You can’t keep lusting after my roommate! I care for you both and I don’t see good things coming out that kind of relationship between you two.”
“Why not?” I asked, with a little bit of an edge to my voice.
“Because Rick has already been through so much pain already in his life he doesn’t need you to complicate things for him. You know he can’t be a military man and be gay at the same time. You would force him to choose between the career and occupation he loves and leading a life as a gay man,” Keith said.
“No, I didn’t know that. So your American military forces discriminate against gays?” I asked.
“Yes, if someone is caught, they can be put in prison or at the very least discharged from the military,” Keith said. “It’s a pretty serious thing for a military guy to live that kind of a life style.”
“It’s not a life style. It’s the way we are, Keith,” I said with a little heat.
“I’m not trying to argue with you, Glenn. I am just pointing out the fact that if you pursue a relationship with Rick it will only end up with both of you being hurt. I don’t want to see that happen. Promise me you will try not to create that kind of a situation?”
“I won’t promise you anything, Keith. I am really attracted to Rick and I won’t lie to you. I don’t want to hurt Rick either so I will promise you I will be very careful where he is concerned. I think Rick is attracted to me too. While you were gone the other day, I broke down crying and Rick took me in his arms and comforted me. We spent most of the afternoon cuddling on his bed. It felt really good to be held by Rick. He made me feel safe and loved. I can’t deny how I felt being next to him, Keith. And before you start yelling at me,” I said as Keith opened his mouth. The anger on his face was readily apparent. “I didn’t throw myself at him. I wasn’t even flirting with him. Well, just a little bit at the pool while we were swimming. I couldn’t help but notice how great he looked in his Speedo swimsuit.”
“Did you do anything else?” Keith asked suspiciously.
“No! I’m not a slut who sleeps with any guy who will take me to bed! Rick overheard me tell my Uncle Dave about Ian. When I got off the phone, I realized Rick had heard everything. Emotionally, I was at the point of total self destruction! Rick took my hand and asked me tell him about. It was like the floodgates were opened and I just poured out my whole life story to him. He listened to me and didn’t make judgments about how stupid I had been to trust Ian. He told me he considered me to be part of his family as he does you, Keith. Rick told me about his ex-girlfriend and how you and Roger rescued him. He also told me about your parents helping him with college.”
“He told you all that,” Keith said in amazement. “Rick doesn’t usually talk very much to anyone about those things especially to someone he doesn’t know very well. I’ve been on double dates with Rick where he hasn’t said more than a dozen words all night. He really must like you too if he told you about all that. I still want you to be careful with him, Glenn. Please tell me you will do that for me?”
“Alright, I will do that for you and for him. I don’t’ want to hurt anyone like Ian hurt me,” I said with conviction.
“Then you had better be willing to tell Ruth Ann the truth and not string her along if you decide you can’t have relationship with her. She’s a sweet girl and deserves to be treated with respect and honesty,” Keith said looking me straight in the eyes to make sure I understood him clearly.
I couldn’t hold his gaze and looked down at the floor. The color started to rise in my face as I thought about what Ruth Ann and I had been doing all week.
“Glenn, what’s up? You are acting really weird right now!” Keith said his voice showing his concern.
“If I tell you, you have to promise never to tell another soul, especially not Kerry or her parents!” I said.
“Alright, I will promise as long as it’s nothing illegal!” Keith.
“Okay, Ruth Ann and I have been sleeping together all week,” I said in voice just above a whisper.
“What! You’ve got to be kidding me!” Keith exclaimed. “How have you two been able to do that? I mean I’m just across the hall and I didn’t hear you leave your room”
“Ruth Ann has come to my room every night after everyone is asleep and spent the rest of the night with me and has returned to her room before everyone wakes up in the morning. So, Keith, yes I like Ruth Ann a lot!”
“You dawg!! You’ve been holding out on me! You can’t be serious! So how did this happen?” Keith asked. His astonishment growing as I continued to explain how Ruth Ann came to our room at the beach and how she managed to spend the night with me here at our grandparents’ home.
“I knew you two were really into each other all week. You both couldn’t keep your hands off of each other. It was almost downright embarrassing! Damn! I should’ve known something was going on! And you did it right under our noses! So how does Ruth Ann feel about you?” Keith asked.
“She really likes me and wants to continue the relationship but she doesn’t want to move too fast since she wants to be a nurse and has already been accepted into a nursing program in Utah. She is leaving next week to begin a summer program out there. She is afraid that a serious long distance relationship wouldn’t work so she wants us to take things a step at a time,” I said.
“You know you could go to the same school as Ruth Ann since you haven’t committed to a college, yet,” Keith suggested.
“I have given that some thought already. I kind of want to stay here and go to Georgia Tech for now. I really like being close to family and I don’t want to up and leave just as I’m starting to get to know you all. It’s really been great meeting all the rest of the family. I always wondered why the American side of the family never came up to see us except Grandma and Grandpa,” I said.
Keith said, “I don’t know all of the details but Mom said that there was a really ugly argument between your dad and the rest of the family not long after your mom and dad were married. It seems that neither side has been willing to bridge the chasm that separates them after all this time. You are the first one to attempt to make contact with us.”
“Well, I can’t take all the credit. Grandpa and Grandma made a pretty good effort to help convince my dad to let me come here. They are trying to bring the family back together but my Dad isn’t ready to take that step, yet. My Mom had to threaten to leave my Dad if he didn’t allow me to come here for the summer,” I said.
“Wow! I didn’t think things were still that bad!” Keith exclaimed.
“Hopefully, I can help make things better for Mom. I know she has missed having her family close. She loves us and Dad very much but I have seen her crying at times. When I asked her what was wrong, she said it’s because she misses her mom and dad, etc. She made me promise never to tell Dad or my siblings.”
Keith yawned really wide and said, “I hate to end this enlightening conversation but I’m heading to bed. I’ll see you in the morning. Good night, Glenn.” Keith left and went to his own room.
I got ready for bed and crawled under the covers. Boy! Did I ever have a lot to figure out! It was almost too much. Being attracted to both sexes certainly complicates things. How I am I supposed to sort this entire thing out on my own? I was also a little annoyed with my cousin. It was okay for me to sex with Ruth and he congratulated me on it, but the thought of me having sex with his roommate had him up in my face about!